A general rule of copywriting thumb: The higher the offer’s price, the longer your copy’s gotta be.
It’s like a math equation: A $100 offer requires you to build less perceived value in the customer’s mind than a $10,000 offer.
But this is a rule of thumb. Rules are meant to be broken, as they say.
Some brands can write emails the length of mini sales letters for ultra-cheap, and the reader will gobble up every word…
And then whip out their credit card faster than you can say, “buy now!”
This article will break down a loooooong email that sells not a paid item… but a FREE giveaway.
Well, it’s not entirely free. It’s free + shipping. But they wrote 11 paragraphs for what amounts to a $5 purchase.
And I think they killed it. Keep reading to see why.
About BioTrust
BioTrust is a health/nutrition company that sells numerous types of health/fitness supplements, like:
- Protein
- Collagen
- Immune health
- Digestion
- Anti-aging
And, of course, BioTrust branded apparel.
I discovered them through YouTube channels I watch that BioTrust happened to sponsor. Although I’ve known about them vaguely beforehand.
Anyways, they seem like a cool company. In fact, they donate 1 meal to a hungry child through No Kid Hungry for EVERY ORDER PLACED.
AND they work with like 5 other charities in various capacities. What cool people.
Alright, email time:
The Email: An Enticingly Generous Giveaway
This email is selling the reader on a free giveaway.
Well, not entirely free. It’s the classic free + shipping tactic.
But as you’ll see, they’re able to hide that fact in the email to increase the CTRs.
(Don’t worry: They aren’t scamming. They mention you have to pay shipping on the page the reader lands on.)
BioTrust is known for loooooong emails. But long isn’t bad if the copy hits hard — even for a low-ticket purchase like this.
I think BioTrust’s copy hits hard in this email. It really elaborates on the benefits and gets people excited to click through.
Interestingly, they write several lines with no line breaks. I don’t think it hurts readability, though. The copy is punchy, and the font is large and readable.
The Send Name: “FREE Probiotics – BioTrust”
BioTrust is one of those brands that plays with the send name a lot. That keeps things fresh. The reader never “gets used to” the same name showing up again and again.
Even if they get used to BioTrust’s habit of varying send names, they can still get caught off guard.
Here’s a fitting send name for this email:
The reader first sees “FREE Probiotics”. That’s something a reader in this market would love.
Then they see the BioTrust name when they click the email, and if they already trust BioTrust (lol), they’re ready to read the email.
The Subject Line: “Sending you a free bottle of Pro-X10 probiotics (need your address – no strings attached)”
Long subject line. Definitely beyond the cutoff. Why did BioTrust do this?
That’s the point.
On mobile, they might see “Sending you a free bottle of Pro…” and that’s about it. Gets the curiosity hamster wheel turning in their brain.
“Who’s sending me something? What are they sending me for free?”
Then they click and see the full thing — which only helps since they have clarity around this topic.
On my desktop, it’s long enough to see as well.
In either case, the writer tells the reader exactly what they’re getting and implies they’re doing it right this moment.
Then there’s the “need your address – no strings attached”, which is intensely personal and grabs the eyeballs. It involves the reader, subconsciously making them want to get into the email body copy.
The Body Copy
We start with BioTrust’s logo and a big blue line.
I’m a proponent of light design elements. No need to HTML the crap out of your email, but a logo and some sparsely placed color can go a long way.
Below the logo comes the first paragraph. This section introduces and justifies the giveaway:
BioTrust gives you the full offer here. You know exactly what you’re going to get. The justification enhances BioTrust’s credibility — brands that give away stuff for no reason may inadvertently train their audience to wait for free stuff.
In the last sentence, BioTrust also paints a picture of what the offer looks like and diffuses an objection. You get the free bottle and NEVER have to worry about getting spammed with future stuff.
A breath of fresh air from an online eCom business.
I like the bolding. Draws the eyes to the important stuff and breaks up the text. That’s important for this paragraph-by-paragraph style.
Speaking of bolding, you’ll see plenty of that, like in the next section:
Why does BioTrust repeat itself here, you ask?
Repetition drills the details in the customer’s brain.
Furthermore, the email breaks down each component of this offer in a separate paragraph. That gives BioTrust room to flesh out the benefits.
They started with the “free” portion since that will have the most objections. BioTrust makes it absolutely clear that “no strings attached” truly means “no strings attached.
The first main paragraph segues well into the next section. Here, BioTrust explains further one of their product’s benefits — the live probiotics.
Mmm, a delicious mix of education and selling. BioTrust explains why other products are inferior.
The customer feels smarter, and feels like they can trust BioTrust. In other words, BioTrust sold on emotions, and justified with logic.
After framing the competition and positioning, BioTrust introduces its product:
Here, they use the positioning in the previous paragraph — “live” vs. “dead” cells/bacteria — to explain the product’s main benefit.
Now, customers see in isolation why this type of product is good AND why the other versions of this product are inferior to BioTrust.
Once again, BioTrust bolds the big info to draw the eyes. In this case, it’s the product.
But BioTrust continues explaining the features and benefits:
The one feature is the “premium and patented ingredients”…
And the benefits are all listed next to the double asterisks.
BioTrust covers several desires — and, therefore, types of customers — in just 3 benefits.
There’s eliminating the “bad” stuff, which is more fear-based.
Then there’s the positive benefit of improving various aspects of health.
Finally, the immediacy benefit. According to BioTrust, you get these amazing health benefits in as little as 5 hours vs. the typical weeks/months.
All that in a free product…
But in online marketing fashion, BioTrust offers a bonus:
The bonus takes a classic formula seen throughout this email: introduce the product, give the main benefit with some curiosity, and explain how they can get it.
Again, the most vital info is bolded here.
Oh, and how about bonus #2:
BioTrust adds the exclusivity factor here. “Exclusive”… “VIP community”… “Every aspect of…”
Lots of language that makes you feel like you’re part of a tribe when you join — not just another Facebook group.
Also, “every aspect of…” is fantastic benefit-driven language.
It’s not “we’ll answer your questions and help you on your health journey”. Bleh.
It’s “We will do everything possible to make sure that you’ve got a flat stomach and your health is transformed.”
The offer’s irresistible at this point. But you gotta recap everything the customer gets so they don’t have to scroll back up and remember everything in the offer.
Value stacking here. These three awesome gifts that solve this particular problem are worth $50 — but you get them free.
You need an enticing number, but a reasonable number.
Too low, and it ain’t compelling.
Too high… and it’s unbelievable, unethical, and possibly illegal (not legal advice). Could even turn customers off entirely by appearing sleazy.
I don’t know the math here, but a $50 value for a bottle of probiotics supplements, an eBook, and online group membership seems reasonable.
By this point, BioTRUST hasn’t answered a burning question:
Why are they giving away all this for $0.00 besides celebrating 2 million bottles sold? What’s the catch?
BioTrust answers right in time:
BioTrust is clear: They want to earn your trust. They even SAY so.
Plus, another mention of the 2 million bottles sold for social proof.
Interesting use of highlight. The lack of a catch is a huge objection here, so good that BioTrust uses readability techniques to draw eyes to it.
BioTrust then uses a slick technique in the next paragraph:
Read everything up to that first comma.
That’s some future pacing. It gets them excited. But beyond that, it’s planting, in the customer’s mind ahead of time, the idea that they will enjoy the product.
This primes the customer to pay attention to the supplement’s effects when they start taking them. The benefits will feel even more potent, increasing the chance that they will buy more in the future.
It’s a bit of pre-suasion, which I learned in Cialdini’s aptly titled Pre-Suasion.
Also, that future-pacing doubles as yet another justification for BioTrust giving away free products.
One more bit of body copy to go. Here’s where we ice the cake with urgency:
It’s scarce. It could be gone without warning. And it’s free, so it’s gonna go fast.
They may even be out of stock!
Seems counterintuitive, but mentioning that revs up curiosity because now customers want to see if it’s still available. Scores more clicks.
Finally, we arrive at the CTA. One final nudge with explicit instructions on how to claim your free bottle, plus the link itself:
Remember: The clearer your copy, the better. Err on the side of providing the instructions and details one too many times, like BioTrust does here.
The CTA is fantastic because it revs up the scarcity once more by reminding the reader of the scarcity. The action language is excellent, too. It’s “Secure Your FREE Bottle Now!” not “Get your free bottle.”
And finally, the Co-Founder signs off.
As I always say, write as a person, not as a brand if possible. Co-Founder Josh, John from marketing, Jane from accounting, whoever it’s gotta be.
Takeaways
It ain’t the quantity of copy that matters… it’s the quality.
Long-form sales emails can work — even for free/low-ticket stuff — if your offer is solid and you convey its benefits in your reader’s language.
And in my opinion, more copy is necessary for free giveaways like this anyways. Customers will be skeptical of any catches or strings attached. Addressing these unique objections for giveaways is the key to getting customers over the finish line.
Zooming out to broad strategy talk, I think this is an excellent way to qualify and segment customers.
Free + shipping that you take a loss on, but your customers can see benefits with your product and join your online community.
That right there can help you lock in a customer’s lifetime loyalty.
What to Do Next
- Get on my email list using the signup form below.
- Reach out to me if you want help writing emails like this one.
- Check out BioTrust for its full selection of nutrition products. You’re also doing good for others — BioTrust donates 1 meal to a hungry child through No Kid Hungry for every order placed… and they work with tons of other charities as well.